No. 01File open
Big Rich
Gentle giant with cheesy jokes
- Size10/10
- Friendliness7/10
- Appetite8/10
- Cleverness8/10
- Sneakiness4/10
- Quirkiness3/10
Introducing the ...
Toe Monsters of Cheddar Gorge
Long ago, deep within the caves of Cheddar, something went wrong. A forgotten block of cheese changed… and so did the creatures who found it. From that moment on, the Toe Monsters were born — strange guardians of a hidden world that shifts, disappears, and refuses to be found. Some say they protect their home. Others say they’re watching us. Either way… it’s best to tread carefully.
Plate 00 · Cheddar Gorge · 23:14
Specimens 01 – 18
Meet the Toe Monsters
Eighteen creatures. Six ratings each, out of ten, recorded honestly — a six means a six, and nobody has been rounded up to be polite. Ten is a lot. One is… not.
No. 02File open
Prof Spin
Sneaky genius with deadly gadgets
- Size6/10
- Friendliness9/10
- Appetite6/10
- Cleverness9/10
- Sneakiness8/10
- Quirkiness6/10
No. 03File open
Miss Lynz
Sweet smiles, deadly traps
- Size1/10
- Friendliness1/10
- Appetite1/10
- Cleverness1/10
- Sneakiness1/10
- Quirkiness1/10
No. 04File open
Uncle Daz
Clean freak with a soft centre
- Size1/10
- Friendliness1/10
- Appetite1/10
- Cleverness1/10
- Sneakiness1/10
- Quirkiness1/10
No. 05File open
Granny Enid
BBQ queen with a dark menu
- Size1/10
- Friendliness1/10
- Appetite1/10
- Cleverness1/10
- Sneakiness1/10
- Quirkiness1/10
No. 06File open
Aunite Fliss
Ninja granny - dont trust the walking stick!
- Size1/10
- Friendliness9/10
- Appetite1/10
- Cleverness1/10
- Sneakiness1/10
- Quirkiness1/10
No. 07File open
El Hefe
Do Toe Monsters exist? Not if El Hefe does his job!
- Size6/10
- Friendliness7/10
- Appetite6/10
- Cleverness8/10
- Sneakiness10/10
- Quirkiness7/10
No. 08File open
McDwayne
The vegan comic who likes a laugh
- Size8/10
- Friendliness7/10
- Appetite6/10
- Cleverness9/10
- Sneakiness6/10
- Quirkiness10/10
No. 09File open
Professor Ste
Mechanical and Electrical Braniac
- Size7/10
- Friendliness7/10
- Appetite5/10
- Cleverness9/10
- Sneakiness7/10
- Quirkiness6/10
No. 10File open
Riccardo
Pizza loving Toe Monster
- Size6/10
- Friendliness7/10
- Appetite8/10
- Cleverness8/10
- Sneakiness6/10
- Quirkiness7/10
No. 11File open
El Diablo
Fun-loving Drummer
- Size6/10
- Friendliness9/10
- Appetite10/10
- Cleverness5/10
- Sneakiness6/10
- Quirkiness7/10
No. 12File open
Buzz
The busy Toe Monster with a sting
- Size5/10
- Friendliness8/10
- Appetite7/10
- Cleverness8/10
- Sneakiness7/10
- Quirkiness6/10
No. 13File open
Gabriel
Angel or Demon?
- Size6/10
- Friendliness8/10
- Appetite6/10
- Cleverness7/10
- Sneakiness5/10
- Quirkiness7/10
No. 14File open
Tiff
Hustler Chef
- Size5/10
- Friendliness7/10
- Appetite6/10
- Cleverness8/10
- Sneakiness6/10
- Quirkiness5/10
No. 15File open
Gav-Su
Ninja Warrior
- Size8/10
- Friendliness7/10
- Appetite7/10
- Cleverness8/10
- Sneakiness9/10
- Quirkiness6/10
No. 16File open
Auntie Ro-Ro
Spicy chef and business guru
- Size5/10
- Friendliness8/10
- Appetite7/10
- Cleverness9/10
- Sneakiness6/10
- Quirkiness6/10
No. 17File open
Uncle Rob
The Master Builder
- Size9/10
- Friendliness2/10
- Appetite8/10
- Cleverness6/10
- Sneakiness5/10
- Quirkiness5/10
No. 18File open
Auntie Hayley
The shopkeeper
- Size6/10
- Friendliness5/10
- Appetite7/10
- Cleverness7/10
- Sneakiness3/10
- Quirkiness9/10
Field note 01 · origins
How were the Toe Monsters created?
Cheddar Gorge is famous for making cheese. The town makes the best known, and tastiest, cheese in the entire world. It’s even better than French cheese, even the stinky ones.
For eons, the cheesemakers of Cheddar have stored their truckles in caves. This is because in ancient times there were no refrigerators or coolers; they didn’t even have electricity! The deep caves offer a cold place to safely store cheese so that they can mature and develop their distinctive taste that makes them so delicious and yummy.
Every now and again, even in the cool environment of a cave, something goes wrong. According to local myths, a few centuries ago, one particularly large lump of cheese got wet, became mouldy, and eventually turned radioactive. Unfortunately, some unexpecting rabbits ate the nuclear cheese. This caused them to mutate into the Toe Monsters.
Field note 02 · location
Where is the Toe Monsters’ Cave?
It’s a secret. No one knows for sure. If the police did know they would have arrested the Toe Monsters decades ago. It’s rumoured to be magical. The few survivors who have seen it are usually unable to remember its location. Probably because they were too busy running for their lives to concentrate on anything else!
One witness, a schoolgirl called Georgie, returned to where she thought it was. She was accompanied by a small army of soldiers, who brought a couple of tanks and lots of big guns. To Georgie’s embarrassment, despite being in the “right place,” she couldn’t find the cave. It had disappeared. All she remembers is that it looked like a giant mouth, with big scary teeth.
Exhibit B · location unconfirmed